Script VO du segment parodique de The Closer par les auteurs de Sesame Street, épisode 4213 "The Camouflage Challenge" - Inscris-toi gratuitement et surfe sans pub !
ACT ONE
FADE IN:
INT. LA POLICE DEPARTMENT
A pink arm shuts the half-open door.
PROVENZA : Hey, chief. Can we go home now? I'm tired of working.
BRENDA : Negative. You know I never go home until all my cases are closed.
GABRIEL : But we closed all the cases, chief.
BRENDA : Is that right, sergeant?
GABRIEL : Yes.
BRENDA : Now what have we got here? Oh, oh, oh. Isn't this a pretty pencil case?
GABRIEL : It is.
BRENDA : Looks like somebody left it open.
PROVENZA : It wasn't me, chief. I didn't do it. no way.
BRENDA : Was it you, sergeant gabriel? Did you leave this case open?
GABRIEL : see, I needed a pencil, and I just--
BRENDA : Case closed!
She goes to Tao's desk.
BRENDA (CONT'D) : Oh, oh, oh, oh, my. Are my eyes playing tricks on me? Is this eyeglass case open, lieutenant?
TAO : Uh, it looks that way, chief. mm-hmm.
BRENDA : You left this case open, did you not, lieutenant tao?
TAO : Yes! I needed my glasses! I couldn't see!
BRENDA : Case closed.
She goes to Provenza's desk.
BRENDA (CONT'D) : Provenza.
PROVENZA : Huh?
BRENDA : What do you suppose a suitcase is doing in the Los Angeles Police Department?
PROVENZA : Well, I was gonna--
BRENDA : Is someone going away, Provenza?
PROVENZA : I was--
BRENDA : For a very long time?
PROVENZA : I was thinking of going to my grandma's.
BRENDA : With an open suitcase?
PROVENZA : I tried to close it, chief, but it won't close.
BRENDA : Well, of course not, silly. You have too much stuff in it.
She drops his clothes on the floor.
PROVENZA : What, what?
BRENDA : Mm-hmm. there you go. Case closed.
GABRIEL : Now that's what I call an open-and-shut case.
Brenda goes to her desk.
BRENDA : Anyone know why this briefcase is open?
TAO : Uh, no, chief. I have no idea.
GABRIEL (O.S.) : Chief, chief, chief.
He joins them at the desk.
GABRIEL (CONT'D) : That's your briefcase.
BRENDA : Oh. well, of course it is. Just wanted to see if y'all were paying attention. Heh heh heh! Case closed.
TAO : Nobody closes a case the way she does.
GABRIEL : Mm-hmm.
PROVENZA : Can we go home now, chief?
BRENDA : Not yet.
PROVENZA : But we closed all our cases.
BRENDA : Yes, but that's not all that needs closing around here. What about that drawer over there and that window, that bag, that box, that off-brand notebook computer, those blinds, hmm, hmm, hmm?
Provenza is flabbergasted.
BRENDA (CONT'D) : Now close your mouth, Provenza, unless you want me to close it for you.
Provenza gulps.
BRENDA (CONT'D) : Mm-hmm.
GABRIEL : No wonder they call here the closer.
FADE TO BLACK.
THE END
